I used to have a Positve Attitude...

Chellie said..."Cinderalla, you have such an amazing attitude!:)"

This made my heart jump... and my first thoughts were I used to have a positive attitude... and then I sat there and stared at the computer... I DO HAVE A POSITIVE ATTITUDE... I am fighting back tears as I write this, so sorry if it is a complete mess, But You see I have been depressed and down and hated myself for at least 2 years now... Before that I was Happy go lucky...the epitome of a SOCIAL BUTTERFLY I was a Fat girl but I would tell you proudly that you would never meet a fat girl cuter than me, I was FAT but I climbed mountains, I was Fat but I went and lived in africa by myself for 4 months and traveled to many other country's, I was FAT but I met the most amazing woman and she made me her wife, I was FAT and wanted to sing opera and didn't care what anyone else had to say about it, I was FAT and loved to dance and didn't think everyone was staring at me and making fun of me... my mom then died, I dropped out of college (opera major)... lost my dad, lost my grandma and then I started hating myself... I got sick all the time, I gained 50 lbs in 2 years, I NEVER wanted to go do anything because people "would make fun of me" I stopped enjoying my life... and until I began this journey I have not had an AMAZING ATTITUDE... But Chellie, thank you... because you made me realize that this change I am making to my body... Is also changing my soul... I am a Pretty FAT Girl, and I will climb mountains again, I will sing opera again even if it is only in my shower, I will DANCE when we go out because I love it, I will remember to say thank you for all the amazing things I have in my life and I will most importantly remember to Love myself... because I am Fan Freaking Tabulous~!